April 2009
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Netflix Self-Torture Experiment Reprise #44:...
Synopsis from Netflix: Trapped in a city as temblors, tornados and asteroids ravage the land, three friends (Carmen Electra, Kim Kardashian and Vanessa Minnillo) get swept up in a series of wacky adventures as they look for a way to stop the onslaught of natural disasters. Poking fun at pop-culture sensations such as “Sex and the City,” There Will Be Blood, Dr. Phil and singer Amy...
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Netflix Self-Torture Experiment Reprise #43:...
This was a suggestion from @ahtitan.
Synopsis from Netflix: After 10 years on the job, Dan (Kris Desautels) is fired because he can’t keep up with his company’s rapid change. Financially strapped, he relocates his family to a remote farmhouse in Wisconsin. But something in the house doesn’t want them there and torments them with a series of unnerving supernatural events. Cyn...
March 2009
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Netflix Self-Torture Experiment Reprise #42:...
This was yet another suggestion from my friend Rachel.
Synopsis from Netflix: Hotel manager Robert Grant (Jason Alexander) is forced by his boss (Faye Dunaway) to postpone his family vacation when a hotel critic checks in. Trouble is, the critic is really a villainous jewel thief (Rupert Everett) with an orangutan assistant named Dunston. When Dunston gets loose and tries to escape a life of...
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Netflix Self-Torture Experiment Reprise #41:...
This was a suggestion from @PhiStu.
Synopsis from Netflix: Noah Cruise (Wesley Jonathan) has the talent to be a professional cager but vows to use his sports scholarship to study medicine at the University of California, Los Angeles, in this fast-paced urban drama. Meanwhile, Noah’s buddy Tech (Anthony Mackie) is focused on getting his general equivalency diploma and winning an underground...
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WatchDomino’s Techno Chicken
I have no idea what (if anything) this video has to do with Domino’s, but I’m posting it because I know it will make spratt/@CcSteff roll her eyes. Thanks to @jkubicek for the link.
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Netflix Self-Torture Experiment Reprise #40:...
This was a suggestion from @RichmondWiki who, oddly enough, currently lives in Michigan.
Synopsis from Netflix: An alien band of killer clowns descends from the cosmos to harvest scores of small-town victims, cocooning their prey in cotton candy to save for later. With the extraterrestrials disguised as harmless circus employees, the authorities don’t suspect a thing. But the joke is on the...
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Netflix Self-Torture Experiment Reprise #39: 3000...
This was a suggestion from inthefade/@abigvictory.
Synopsis from Netflix: Viva Las Vegas meets Ocean’s Eleven in this gritty caper film about Elvis impersonators, a $3 million heist and a big double cross. Kevin Costner and Kurt Russell slap on some sideburns, don the shades and rip off some major coin from the Riviera Hotel. But before they can make a clean break, Costner tries to abscond...
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Netflix Self-Torture Experiment Reprise #38: Baby...
Synopsis from Netflix: Who’d have guessed that babies are born with innate knowledge of the universe’s secrets — and can speak to each other in an esoteric language? Evil Dr. Kinder (Kathleen Turner) and her associate, Dr. Heap (Christopher Lloyd), want to break the code and use it to sell more baby products. But they’ll never succeed if it’s up to baby Sly!
My...
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USC football coach Pete Carroll is obsessed with... →
I think this is the ultimate sign that Twitter has gone mainstream. *sad tuba* Still, it would be pretty cool if Will Ferrell started tweeting.
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Netflix Self-Torture Experiment Reprise #37:...
Synopsis from Netflix: Crazy skits, TV show parodies and music videos — all irreverently humorous — pervade this disc. From supermodels to bag ladies, no one escapes this onslaught of rampant lampoonery! Features Michael Clarke Duncan, Guns N’ Roses’ Slash, Baywatch’s Gena Lee Nolin, Karen Black, billboard queen Angelyne and tabloid disgrace Joey Buttafuoco.
My...
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Netflix Self-Torture Experiment Reprise #36:...
Synopsis from Netflix: In an attempt to play hero, a bumbling small-town deputy (Larry the Cable Guy) “saves” a well-heeled woman (Ivana Milicevic) from the four men holding her hostage. The fact that her captors were FBI agents never crossed his mind, but it doesn’t mean his instincts were all wrong. Jenny McCarthy, Joe Mantegna and Richard Bull also star in this slapstick...
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Watch“Twouble with Twitter”
Now I’m going to have nightmares about being eaten by the fail whale.
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Netflix Self-Torture Experiment Reprise #35:...
Synopsis from Netflix: A half-human, half vampire sets out to destroy her vampire king father in this Gothic horror film based on the video game. Bloodthirsty Lord Kagan (Ben Kingsley) wants his daughter to become a full-fledged vampiress, but fanged femme fatale Rayne (Kristanna Loken) denounces her father’s legacy and instead joins up with a trio of vampire hunters (Michael Madsen,...
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If You’re Out There - John Legend
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Netflix Self-Torture Experiment Reprise #34: Disco...
Synopsis from Netflix: Tucker Williams (Rudy Ray Moore) is a former cop who spends his nights spinning vinyl at a disco. When his nephew (Julius J. Carry III) starts using angel dust, Williams pulls out his martial-arts skills and stirs things up. He gets help from Noel (Carol Speed), and together the pair goes after big-time dealer Stinger Ray (James H. Hawthorne). Unfortunately, Ray and his men...
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Netflix Self-Torture Experiment Reprise #33:...
This was another suggestion from my friend Rachel.
Synopsis from Netflix: Ray (Ted Danson) is an ex-con and widower who plans a coin heist to fund his dreams of owning a bakery. The heist is a success, but Ray’s estranged son, Timmy (Macaulay Culkin), shows up and holds the loot hostage. Now, Ray will have to be the father he always should have been if he ever wants to see the coins again....
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Netflix Self-Torture Experiment Reprise #32:...
This was a suggestion from zippy48.
Synopsis from Netflix: Stock market millionaire Chris Thorne (Chevy Chase) and investment lawyer Diane Lightson (Demi Moore) are headed to Atlantic City when they take the wrong exit off the New Jersey Turnpike. A local cop (John Candy) stops them for speeding in a curious town, where they’re brought before 106-year-old Judge Alvin Valkenheiser (Dan...
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P-Funk Is Playing At My House - DJ Riko
I had a...
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Netflix Self-Torture Experiment Reprise #31: What...
Synopsis from Netflix: Slacker janitors Tyrone (Kadeem Hardison) and Jerome (Godfrey) dream of the good life. Their fortunes improve when they find — and promptly spend — a briefcase full of money. Unfortunately, the cash belonged to mobster Mr. Spaghetti (Sonny Bermudez), who naturally wants it back. Now, Tyrone and Jerome have one week to return it — or else. Is their...
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Netflix Self-Torture Experiment Reprise #30:...
This was another suggestion from badkitty- (or @badkitty_ if you prefer). She admits never having watched it, so I am her de facto guinea pig in this situation.
Synopsis from Netflix: A lab mix-up accidentally swaps a vaccine with a virus that turns a high school full of students and teachers into flesh-eating zombies. But all is not lost: New student hottie Aki discovers that the swim team is...
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Netflix Self-Torture Experiment Reprise #29 - Dumb...
Synopsis from Netflix: This wacky prequel to the 1994 blockbuster goes back to the lame-brained title characters’ days as classmates at a Rhode Island high school, where the unprincipled principal (Eugene Levy) puts the pair in remedial courses as part of a scheme to fleece the school. Derek Richardson and Eric Christian Olsen star as the cretinous duo, with Mimi Rogers, Cheri Oteri and Luis...
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So I filled out my goddamn bracket...
Join my ESPN group if you want: Twitter/Tumblr Geeks. No webcocks allowed.
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Netflix Self-Torture Experiment Reprise #28:...
Synopsis from Netflix: Discover how an unassuming woman named Patience Prince becomes the fiendish feline Catwoman (Halle Berry) in this purr-fect adventure movie. As Catwoman, Patience discovers she has the senses, speed, reflexes and perhaps even the nine lives of a cat, opening her to a thrilling and dangerous world where she vacillates between good and evil. Co-stars Sharon Stone, Benjamin...
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Netflix Self-Torture Experiment Reprise #27 -...
Synopsis from Netflix: A camping trip goes very wrong when five college students are kidnapped by a secret cult that plans to sacrifice them to a mysterious hairy beast called the Yeti — who turns out to harbor a deep attraction to young men — in this raunchy comedy. The situation starts to improve when one of the victims begins to examine his own desires and finds that the Yeti...
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“There are two kinds of people in this world: those who believe there are two...”
– Tom Robbins, Still Life With Woodpecker